HA HA HA

I loved this cartoon.

(1) The hen has cheated the cock; Infidelity

(2) She did it with an elephant; Genetics!!!

(3) She laid an egg - "AANAMUTTA"; mutation!!

(4) Cock finds out that his wife was unfaithful - he can distinguish a chick from a chick-elephant; Common sense!

(5) The chick-elephant already looks like a grown up elephant; Hybrid!

(6) Fidelity is important in every man-woman relationship; Values!

(7) Cock is upset and reacting like a man; Newton's third law!

(8) Hen never thought that a mistake would lead to such consequences. Next time she will use protection; Prevention is better than cure!

(9) The cock calls the hen a bitch; altogether there are four species involved - hen, elephant (not seen) chick-elephant and cock;Unity in Diversity!

Looks and riches!

In general, women go for the cuteness factor and for the money factor. If they get a good package of cuteness and money, then they consider themselves as superlucky. Relationships have become superficial. When it comes to money factor, job matters. Earlier, women would close their eyes and marry a softeware engineer. You are the lucky match if you have a blooming career in software. Like flies on excreta, women queue in for such guys. Its not different in the case of guys: they need a beautiful wife who knows to cook and who gets a fair (and heavy share) from the ancestral property, eventhough she is not working. This makes them settled in life becos if the girl comes with 10 kgs of Gold , a car and a house, then what matters - "Dowry is not dowry in kerala - its the right of a woman" (this deep thought might have been coined by some butcher who wanted heavy dowry for his good-for-nothing son). However, there are exceptions: people look for companionship, soul mates, and the clever ones just imagine a life with the person after 10 years - trust me! that ends your quest for the right one!

I wonder how people can find love amidst all this. Many are the cases where people fall for looks and end up with the biggest disasters in their lives. Life is not superficial when yu start living it. Living together requires lot of adjustment and compromises else why to get married?? staying single is better.

"I am so goody goody": this is the big mistake everyone does - fake as goody goody when yu are not that goody goody and this leads to problems. Yu can fake before the whole world but not with the one yu have chosen to live with your entire life. All the goody goody masks are pulled down in a matter of time and what lies beneath is exposed (be it dirt or pearls!). Inner beauty!! thats the word. When you are old and you are still glowing - its nothing but your inner beauty! (read somewhere, donnow where :-s)

No one is perfect - thats the truth and many divorces take place because yu expect your partner to be perfect all the time. The glow of skin fades with time, what remains in a relationship then is the fact that how much yu need each other and how much yu love each other - and lastly and more importantly, how much you have invested in your relationship.

Got a forward today: Why women rule the world? "What is mine is mine and what is yours is also mine"

Madness doubled!

With permissions:

meme: hmmm sheri sheri
u will call for marriage or wot ?
me: ok il try
meme: U WILL TRY >???? how dare
@#@!#$$
i wont come #!@#
me: venda nee enne vilichu polum illellode makree
meme: i dont know that yu are alive
me: u didnt even chk
meme: err OKAY bye
I AM NOT COMING $#^#$&&
me: podey makree
meme: @$!$#@%
me: athu ninte $#^$^*^$
meme: err..birrk
me: prr prr
meme: prr
me: I guess we were twins in our former life, if any was there
meme: yeah me too I never thot that there was someone like me
me: sis
meme: yeah true u are my bro only
me: yaya
meme: glad to find yu
me: me tooo
me: podeeeey makreephobic penne
meme: nee peechali
Da !!!

Onion peel pericardium for sale!! Pirrr pirrrr....

She: I had gone to meet my friend yesterday. She is fine. Her mom is fine. I am going to their place tommorow
He:You visited them just now? Again you want to go?
She: Yeah! its fun being there!!
He:ok (pirr pirr)
She: BTW I got a new shade of lipstick
He: You look beautiful without lipstick
She: But I like wearing lipstick, I am going to buy it anyway!
He: ok (pirrrr pirrrrr)
She: What else? What else at your end?
He: nothing! yu have more news - yu tell!
She: Are yu alright?
He: mmm mmm
She: What happened now?
He: nothing ...(pirr pirrrr)
She: Did I hurt you or anything? (In mind: did I say anything wrong?)
He: nope .. nothing can hurt me
She: Then how come yu became so silent (OH GOSH!! what now?)
He: mmm (pirr pirr)
She: Can yu just tell me if there is any problem?
He: I think we should talk later (pirr pirrr).bye

Note: "pirr pirr" refers to the tearing of the pericardium. Sissy guys and girls experience this. Nothing can be said to them. They can't take anything. Their hearts will be covered with very ultrathin onion-peelish pericardium that can't stand anything, literally anything. I myself donnow what to do with such sissy beings. (I think their heart should be distilled and scraped and boiled and then pressed in a die and vulcanized!!!)

Motherhood

To be a mother makes a woman complete. I scare at the thought of being a mother. I wonder if I would be able to be effectively do my responsibilities as a mother. I donnow if i am still mentally prepared to be a mom; I am surprised to see young women (20 ish) getting married bearing kids and then bearing more kids. Looking after kids is like devoting yourself 24/7 for someone. Every mother does that. My mother also did that. I never asked her if she was scared to have a baby.

One of my friends used to tell me that she wants to have kids as soon as she gets married. I told her that I don't want to have kids. She scolded me by saying that you don't want to be complete as a woman, as a wife etc. I would like to have four kids - I know it sounds outrageous - two is boring, three is crowd and four is fun !!! Its easy to say this - but bearing four kids sounds as a gargantuan task.

My sister-in-law gave birth to twins and I wonder how she, mom and dad managed with the babies. When I saw the babies, they were seven months. they constantly needed the attention of others and since the house was filled with adults, they seemed to get it. They drink milk, sleep, wake up, smile or cry - then back to sleep and we have to cuddle them or sing a sweet lullaby so that they will sleep. And this was like an ongoing process - sleep, cry, wakeup, drink, susu, change, sleep, cry, wakeup, drink, susu, change; What I noticed was that they were two and their timings never synchronized. For instance, one would cry for milk and the other would cry for sleep. One would sleep and the other would be ready for playing. PHEW!!! I got tired seeing this (just seeing this!!!). But, I like to cuddle them and give them milk and click their pics. Even though one of them looked with some kinda weird expression at me - she hardly slept in my arms. Maybe I had bony hands or she was not comfortable with the idea of clicking pics every now and then.
I thot of discarding the idea of having quadruplets. Wouldn't it be a disaster if I am not mentally prepared to handle them??
I would have babies only when I am mentally prepared to handle them. Else, I won't be doing justice to myself and the kids as a mom or a homemaker. In fact, I just can't handle myself (child woman I am :P) ... err how will I handle more???? I hope that soon the grow out of this scary cocoon where I am scared of the very thought of having kids. Its not like this all the time; sometimes, i break off the cocoon and have pangs to carry a baby and it suddenly diminishes!!
I love babies and I love their sweet smell. I love their burps and their toothless grins. But! Damn!! why am I scared of being a mother??? (irony)

Quote: From my doctor colleague "Some women are too weak that they can't push the baby out and we have to push for them!!!! Can you believe this??"

Women are phenomenal!

Last day I got the following forward:

Mum and Dad were watching TV when Mum said, "I'm tired, and it's getting late. I think I'll go to bed." She went to the kitchen to make sandwiches for the next day's lunches. Rinsed out the popcorn bowls, took meat out of the freezer for supper the following evening, checked the cereal box levels, filled the sugar container, put spoons and bowls on the table and started the coffee pot for rewing the next morning. She then put some wet clothes in the dryer, put a load of clothes into the washer, ironed a shirt and secured a loose button. She picked up the game pieces left on the table, put the phone back on the charger and put the telephone book into the drawer. She watered the plants, emptied a wastebasket and hung up a towel to dry. She yawned and stretched and headed for the bedroom. She stopped by the desk and wrote a note to the teacher, counted out some cash for the excursion and pulled a text book out from hiding under the chair. She signed a birthday card for a friend, addressed and stamped the envelope and wrote a quick note for the grocery store. She put both near herbag Mum then washed her face with 3 in 1 cleanser, put on her Night Solution & age fighting moisturizer, brushed and flossed her teeth and filed her nails. Dad called out, "I thought you were going to bed." "I'm on my way," she said. She put some water into the dog's dish and put the cat outside, then made sure the doors were locked and the patio light was on. She looked in on each of the kids and turned out their bedside lamps and radios, hung up a shirt, threw some dirty socks into the hamper, and had a brief conversation with the one up still doing homework. In her own room, she set the alarm; laid out clothing for the next day, straightened up the shoe rack. She added three things to her 6 most important things to do list. She said her prayers, and visualized the accomplishment of her goals. About that time, Dad turned off the TV and announced to no one in particular. "I'm going to bed." And he did...without another thought. Anything extraordinary here? Wonder why women live longer...? 'CAUSE THEY ARE MADE FOR THE LONG HAUL...... (And they can't die sooner they still have things to do!!!!)

When I read through this post, I just remembered one person - My mother-in-law (my new mom!). I always wonder at the way she efficiently handles things and does her work without being tired. She is always early to rise than the sun and does everything in a jiffy very systematically. she is definitely one of the best of home makers I have seen to date (apart from my mom). To be proactive!! This must be learnt from her.
However, in general, women are defenitely masters in multi-tasking. There are women who travel from Pune to Mumbai (3 hrs of commute) for work and then manage their homes. Isn't it amazing!! ??? My energy level drops down after Wednesday - I go into a trance because my eyes start craving for rest and a weekend where I can sleep late! As I travel in the local train train ladies compartment that echoes with incessant chatters of working women, I wonder how they could save the energy for this too. Indeed, its a case of juggling elephants with one hand.
Women in Mumbai surprise me with their undefiable spirit. Except for their loud mouths and rudeness, I admire them for the way they try to make both ends meet. Mumbai turned out to be the rudest city in some survey (In fact, a survey was not necessary!). With the conditions provided, I feel that the people are not rude just because they want to be brats; the life is too busy and they become frustrated with long commutes and additional resposibilities. Women, having a high bp level and short temper, outdo men in shouting and pushing and cursing each other. No wonder, the generation that follows is rude becos the "rude gene" is automatically incorporated by birth (Mad theory of mine).

The truth: I don't want a busy life where I don't have time for anything :(. Mumbai scares me and never allows me to sleep.

Good wife to be

From the Bible,
[1] An excellent wife who can find?She is far more precious than jewels.
11 The heart of her husband trusts in her,and he will have no lack of gain.
12 She does him good, and not harm,all the days of her life.
13 She seeks wool and flax,and works with willing hands.
14 She is like the ships of the merchant;she brings her food from afar.
15 She rises while it is yet nightand provides food for her householdand portions for her maidens.
16 She considers a field and buys it;with the fruit of her hands she plants a vineyard.
17 She dresses herself [2] with strengthand makes her arms strong.
18 She perceives that her merchandise is profitable.Her lamp does not go out at night.
19 She puts her hands to the distaff,and her hands hold the spindle.
20 She opens her hand to the poorand reaches out her hands to the needy.
21 She is not afraid of snow for her household,for all her household are clothed in scarlet. [3]22 She makes bed coverings for herself;her clothing is fine linen and purple.
23 Her husband is known in the gateswhen he sits among the elders of the land.
24 She makes linen garments and sells them;she delivers sashes to the merchant.
25 Strength and dignity are her clothing,and she laughs at the time to come.
26 She opens her mouth with wisdom,and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.
27 She looks well to the ways of her householdand does not eat the bread of idleness.
28 Her children rise up and call her blessed;her husband also, and he praises her:
29 “Many women have done excellently,but you surpass them all.”
30 Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain,but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
31 Give her of the fruit of her hands,and let her works praise her in the gates.

I feel down when I read this chapter 31 of Proverbs :(; I am not a bad wife but I am a constantly improving so-so wife. Since I am a working woman, I just donnow or I am not clear of how much I am able to obey these verses and be a good wife. "She opens her mouth with wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue." In fact, this is a real stab - I open my mouth mostly to say some poor jokes or some freaky ideas!! But, I do give my opinion where its needed.

However, after work, If my bones are not weary, I do cook food for my husband. I clean the house and wash the clothes during weekends (not regularly). I love my husband and take care not to constantly nag, cry and scream (brat wife) (inspite of being an emotional cry baby!!). If I didn't know to cook well - I must confess - Life would have been a disaster!!! I just wait for the twinkle in his eyes after he has food just to confirm that YAY!! I have did a good job.

Wish me good luck to be a good wife asap!